Be Transformed by the Renewing of your mind

So I am reading this book called "Hooked" New Science on How Casual Sex Is Affecting Our Children by Joe S. McIlhaney, J.R MD and Freda Mckissic Bush, MD.

Now I am not usually the one who can understand scientific literature, but this book is wrecking me. It's opening up my wounds from past relationships, it's helping me understand why relationships have not worked out for me and lastly I believe it is a gift from God because He has told me over and over to not ponder the past for behold He is doing something new!

The basic premise of the book describes how sexual experiences whether in the context of a healthy marriage or outside of marriage affect and mold the brain because the brain is the largest and most important sex organ. It describes the neurochemicals that are given off in a female and in a male to bond them together. For a female it's called oxytocin. For a male it is called vasopressin. We both give off Dopamine. I sound smart so far don't I? lol

Anyway, what has been wrecking my brain is this chemical called Oxytocin. Although Oxytocin is presented in both a male and a female, it is mostly represented in a female. What's crazy about oxytocin is that God created oxytocin to not only bond a woman to a man through sexual intercourse but also by just the simple act of touch. Not only that but also for the onset of labor and for breast feeding.

Here is the part that makes me cry every time I think about it. The book stated that because Oxytocin is values-neutral meaning it cannot distinguish between a one night stand and a long term relationship, "it can cause a woman to bond to a man even during what was expected to be a short- term relationship and it can lead a woman to be taken off guard by a desire to stay with a man she would other wise find undesirable and stay with him anyway, even if the relationship is abusive. 20 seconds of hugging a man can release Oxytocin and if he escalates the physical it becomes harder for her to say no!" Why didn't I know any of this before? Ahhhh

Now I am only giving you a glimpse of all that I have read. There's so much more. They explained how when you bond and break up with someone especially when sex was involved the brain scanners show that the part of the brain that is affected is the same part that is affected when you are physically wounded! Whoa

Of course all of this has gotten me thinking about my past and how I desire to have a healthy marriage someday. I want to get to the root of my issues that I walked through in my past so I can be not only a good wife and mother but friend too. There's so much more I want to write about concerning this book so I am sure I will be blogging about this more very soon.

One of things that encouraged me and I believe is very biblical is the fact that the authors stated that our brains are moldable from birth until death. Ahhh Hope!
My prayer is that God would transform my mind and help rearrange my old patterns for His new ones.